


my mind got twisted (stole my heart)

by timeslip



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: M/M, Supervillain AU, not so super villain bc no actual crime occurs, rated for swearing and mentions of gun violence, this is lowkey a crack fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-23
Updated: 2018-04-23
Packaged: 2019-04-27 00:13:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 922
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14413503
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/timeslip/pseuds/timeslip
Summary: Joshua was really too nice to deserve this.He must’ve killed a puppy in his past life, because this was the fifth break-in at his job he’d had to deal with this week. Of course, crimes like this were an everyday occurrence in Metropolis, and frankly, it got annoying. Joshua, for whatever reason, had decided to become a banker, which was of course one of the most common targets for villains, super or not.





	my mind got twisted (stole my heart)

**Author's Note:**

> thief: i’ll steal everything
> 
> me: [thinking] you won’t steal my heart
> 
> thief: btw you look stunning
> 
> me: fuck

Joshua was really too nice to deserve this.

He must’ve killed a puppy in his past life, because this was the fifth break-in at his job he’d had to deal with this week. Of course, crimes like this were an everyday occurrence in Metropolis, and frankly, it got annoying. Joshua, for whatever reason, had decided to become a banker, which was of course one of the most common targets for villains, super or not.

Joshua sighed, ignoring the civilians screaming around him to lock up the teller windows as today’s villain flew through the now-broken window, laughing.

“I’m stealing everything,” the villain announced, walking towards the window. “Now, hand over the key to the vault before I blast this place to smithereens”

 _You sure aren’t stealing any hearts_ , Joshua thought bitterly, backing away from the approaching man.

The villain leaned over the counter and said offhandedly “By the way, you look stunning today,”

Joshua was too shocked for a second to form a response. Why did his heart just flutter? Fuck.

The villain smiled sweetly (how can villains even be sweet?) and pulled what looked like a blaster of some kind out of his belt. “The vault key, please,”

Joshua sighed internally again. Ok, so nevermind sweet.

“Nice try, Mr. Bad Guy, but we’re literally the most robbed bank in Metropolis, and we have the police department right next door. It won’t be that easy.”

The villain laughed, and Joshua had to stamp down his initial thought that, damn, this guy’s laugh was really nice, not maniacal and annoying like most other villains, because he was a _villain_ for crying out loud, and Joshua could not afford to be distracted by his sweet words and even sweeter laugh. His mind flashed to his boss’s disappointed face as they had to cross out the sign that read “Days without being robbed: 3” and replace it with a 0.

“Oh, they won’t be a problem,” the villain sing-songed, “you see, I have this cool ability to make anyone fall asleep on my command, any time, any place.” Joshua groaned, of course, the robbery to happen during his shift was a villain with actual powers, not just some wannabe with a toy gun. Suddenly, he realized the people in the bank had stopped screaming, but they weren’t gone, and no one had been shot. Instead, when he looked around, he saw a handful of people slumped over, hanging on to doors and potted plants, fast asleep.

“It’s actually quite handy for when I can’t sleep at night, or when I need to get out of class,” the villain continues brightly, then cuts himself off, “anyways, the vault! I was going to treat myself this afternoon, but I won’t have time to at this rate,” The villain pouts- why does Joshua find that so _cute_ \- and holds his blaster up again. His mask covers most of his face and Joshua can only see his mouth but it’s enough to show his smirk at Joshua’s shocked and flustered expression. The sight of the smirk is enough to snap Joshua out of it. He was put in charge of the bank counter during prime crime hours because he was good at his job, not to be distracted by villains with pretty lips.

“Do you have like, a supervillain name or something?” Joshua asks, stalling for time.

The villain considers, rubbing his chin with gloved fingers. “Nah, I’ve never really thought about it. I wouldn’t call myself a supervillain either, this is just something I do for fun,” he gestures at Joshua with his blaster, causing the bank teller to flinch backwards. “Do you have any suggestions? My friend told me I should be called Angel of Sleep, but that sounds a bit pretentious.” The villain giggles again, “I think I’m more of a devil anyways,” he adds with a wink.

“U-uh, I dunno, that sounds like a cool name to me,” Joshua shrugs, trying not to be obvious as he takes the vault card key from under the counter and slips it into his front pocket. It would be easier to protect there.

Obviously, his attempts at distracting the villain had not been good enough, as said villain narrows his eyes.

“Whatcha got there, pretty?” he smirks again as Joshua freezes, caught.

“Definitely not the card key, nope. Alright gotta go bye!” Joshua realizes his chance at stalling until help arrived, assuming they hadn’t been put to sleep yet by the villain, were shot, and now his only chance was to escape was by running away with the key card before the villain could get it. However, before he could get out the door, he felt a wave drowsiness hit him. Shit, that's right, this villain had actually powers other than talking.

The villain tisked, strolling over and pulled the key card from Joshua’s pocket as he lay there, too sleepy to even lift his head.

The last thing he hears before passing out is, “It’s a shame you’re so pretty, I almost feel bad for having to steal from you,”

When he wakes up later, Joshua discovers that only $10 has been stolen. He decides not to report the incident to the police, which definitely has nothing to do with the note he found in his pocket along with the keycard.

_Xxx-xxx-xxxx_  
_Call me so we can meet for coffee some time! My treat ;))))_  
_Jeonghan aka The Angel of Sleep_

  
Yeah, definitely nothing to do with that. The police have enough on their hands already, after all.

**Author's Note:**

> the title sounds dark but it's from falling for u lmao
> 
> (i scream abt jihan on [twitter](https://twitter.com/necrobulist))  
>  [curious cat](https://t.co/v6dkNS7i7m)


End file.
